A word of encouragement or a word of anxiety.

A word of hope and faith, or a word of doubt. 
We build and destroy with our words.  
We teach and also take with our words.

Do you share the strength that is in you with patience and kindness?  That's a tough one, I know it's a daily challenge.  Today was one of those days.

Only moments ago, I watched my son snap at my daughter.

It was a simple thing.

She said something kind of loud and he snapped off a few choice rude words.

What followed stayed with me in a painful way;  she wallowed, slumped, spoke slowly, answered quietly and basically demonstrated the behavior of a defeated person.

A part of me wanted to just smack him and scold, "Don't talk to your sister like that!"  But the other part of me won today and when she was out of range a bit, I asked my son a simple question so she could not hear me, "Maurice, are you a builder or destroyer?"

He glanced up at me with a look of obvious confusion.

Then I pointed and he followed my finger as it led to his little sister.

I kept it simple, trying to help him understand what his words can do, and more importantly, what his words do to her!

As I pointed at my baby girl, I explained in an intentionally calm, almost soothing voice, "You can destroy or build. You can lift her up or push her down. It's up to you, and it starts with your words."

He first appeared a little irritated, behaving as if he thought he was in trouble.

Then the miracle happened.

As they walked in the front door together, I heard him tease her with a joke, then softly knudge her in the side with his elbow. Beautiful! 

A hug would have been too corny, saying sorry too guilty, but a joke and a knudge was the mature thing to do for this growing 12-year-old. I pray this means that he is becoming a builder.  A builder of great things, with many powerful words.

To you and yours in 2009, may you build up many things, most importantly - the ones you love the most!

Denise ..